A Very Merry Anniversary Wrap Up

If you watch my youtube channel or follow me on any of my social medias, you'd know that I recently celebrated my 2 year wedding anniversary.

Leading up to our trip, there was quite a bit of stress and planning involved. At first we were trying to make a week in Hawaii work, but finally it fell through, so off to plan B... Vegas. My husband bought us Britney Spears tickets and I was elated! Now I know Britney hasn't been her best since 2007, but there's something about getting to see my high school pop idol live.

The week leading up to the trip, I was filming, editing, cleaning, and working like crazy to make sure our trip would be as smooth and stress free while we were there.

Monday I took the babies (if your new they are my 2 dogs not actual human babies) to my mom's for her to watch while we went away. While I was at my mom's my husband lets me know that they have canceled his returning flight home and they are trying to schedule him on a new flight. I start to panic... what if he doesn't make it back in time?!

A few hours later I get a phone call from my husband, clearly he has not gotten on the plane.
He calls: "Well your not going to believe what happened, I guess we're not going to see Britney."

I PANIC I'm thinking there is no way in HELL I am not going to drive myself to vegas and go see her on my own. Then he says that I have booked a job (acting job).

"That's not possible, I haven't auditioned for anything," was my response.

My husband says: "No it's a direct booking from your last audition." (these things apparently really happen)

I still don't believe him.

Flash forward to a few more hours, me finally believing him. I ended up working on Tuesday and our tickets are for Wednesday so worst case we can still drive in Wednesday morning to go see my pop idol.

Basically everything worked out. I worked early Tuesday morning and was wrapped just before 11am.

I play a Young Teacher

My OOT from my trailer

Gotta take a selfie!

This whole time I thought things were working agains us and our trip, but I got to work on one of my favorite shows, take a week long vacation with my husband, and see Britney Bitch!

At the concert

Look how tiny she is!

Nils from Beautylish sent me this autographed perfume from Britney. I was kind of gushing about how excited I was for the concert on Sunday at the Beautylish Charlotte Tilbury Launch. 

Sometimes things going wrong really are things going right.

XOXO
Serein

P.S.
HUGE Vegas makeup haul will be up soon on my channel. Make sure your subscribed!

July Favorites

Every month the beauty community rally up their beauty favorites to share with the world. As I gather my own collection of favorites to film and upload on youtube, I can't get this overwhelming sensation of how fast time is just passing me by.

All of July's Makeup Favorites, which I use in a very wearable makeup tutorial in My July Favorites and Tutorial Video on Youtube

Summer is almost over and everyone is already on the back to school craze, I AM NOT READY. This brings me back the the anxiety of auditioning for Christmas commercials in summer. If you don't know, because of production turnaround, most commercials, films, and television shows are filmed months in advance. So odds are summer beach bikini commercials are filmed in the dead of winter on a freezing beach and fun festive winter holiday commercials are filmed in the hottest months in summer with fake snow and LOTS of winter gear in the hottest months. It's crazy and uncomfortable.

It seriously freaks me out to keep thinking a season ahead. I want to savor today and live in the moment. of course I will think of future plans, wants, needs, and goals, but somehow these monthly favorites bring me a bit of anxiety.

So without further a due... here are my monthly favorites in video form and in pretty pictures. The "pretty" may be lacking on the pictures, since my uncle just left me a camera that I'm trying to figure out. So while I have finally figured out how to use my Canon Rebel T5i for filming my youtube videos, I'm now trying to learn an outdated Sony DSLR for my blog photos. Bare with me.

For details on the products and how I use them please watch my video. 

Murad Pore Reform Skin Smoothing Polish: 

Murad Blackhead and Pore Clearing Duo

Caudalie Beauty Elixir:

CND Solar Oil: 

(Use coupon code: SereinSleekhair14 for $15 off of $75)

CND Weekly Polish Cerulean Sea:

(Use coupon code: SereinSleekhair14 for $15 off of $75)

CND Weekly Top Coat:

(Use coupon code: SereinSleekhair14 for $15 off of $75)

Mehron Velvet Finish Primer:

http://www.mehron.com/Velvet_Finish_Primer_p/194.htm

Laura Geller Beauty Cool Lids Cream Eye Shadow

2nd Love Baked marble Blush in Sunshine:

The White Queen by Phylippa Gregory

Paper Towns by John Green

*Get a FREE audio book here:

http://www.audibletrial.com/dressyourselfhappy

Amrezy Palette

It Cosmetics Celebration Foundation Medium

Tarte Amazonian Clay Waterproof Brow Mousse:

Jose Maran Coconut Watercolor Eyeshadow in Rio De Rose

Cle De peau Beaute Concealer in Beige

Alexa Chung Lash Enhancing Eye Do Eyeliner Eyeko

Chanel Liner in 911

Tarte lights, camera, splashes mascara

Clinque Bottom Lash Mascara:

2nd Love Baked Bronzer in Sun kissed:

It Cosmetics CC+ Radiance Ombre Bronzer

YSL Glossy Stain in #7

Elizabeth and James Nirvana White Rollerball

What were your monthly favorites this last month?

xoxo-
Serein

*some above links are affiliate links. Please read disclaimer page if you have any concerns.

Facebook Is Not a Form Of Communication

Here's a daily rant and personal pet peeve of mine...

Facebook while great for stalking your old classmates, co-workers, and sharing silly photos and quizzes, is not a form of actual dependable communication.

In the days of social media and wonderful life improving technology, we as a society have lost some personal contact with humanity.

I'm a big believer in traditions for special occasions and following some basic etiquette, especially for engagements, weddings, announcements, and major life changing events.

Our Engagement Shoot Photo By Scott Land Photography

For example: If you expect me to take time off work, buy a ticket, buy a present, and come to your wedding, where you or your family has spent considerable amounts of time and money on, I expect something more than an Evite, FB Event,  or E-mail. Don't get mad when you need to remind me to attend your supposed special event.

This also means that if I spent the time and money to pick out paper invitations and personally addressed each invitation and purchased the ridiculous over priced stamp from the post office and included a self addressed return envelope or an "RSVP to and by", I expect a damn response! RSVP is not optional!!!

My Sister Hosted our Engagement Party and did all the food.

As we become more comfortable behind a screen, we loose touch of common decency and consideration for each other and it's truly sad. I see it when I goto the store and I see it more and more on the road. It makes me want to move somewhere far away from everyone and really brings out my anxiety and depression.

Me somewhere far away

I admit I'm the first person to avoid chatting on the phone, I hate it, I rather you text me a place and time and I'll spend my whole day chatting with you in person. That's just me.

Now you might think I sound like a total hypocrite since I have a youtube channel and blog and most of my day is spent on social media of some sort. My argument is not against social media, I think social media is a great form of expression, sharing photos, sharing general life events, and a great business tool for promoting oneself or company. my argument is that if you expect me to be somewhere or to know your trying to get a hold of me, use the fucking phone or at least my e-mail!

Shameless self promotion, but go check out my youtube channel if you haven't already!

I've had many missed events and messages lately and folks are upset with me for not responding, attending, or knowing what is up, well being a blogger I spend so much time responding to comments, e-mail, and maintaining all forms of social media, that I'm not going to be able to maintain my personal life on there as well. In fact I resent it when expected to.

I make it to events when I know about them! Screening of Sleep Away Camp

So next time your throwing a party and I don't know about it or show up, instead of getting mad at me, maybe think about the way you invited people. If your event is truly that important for people to attend I'll give you a hint, Facebook Invite isn't the way to go.

xoxo
Serein

My Birthday Month Has Begun!

I love to celebrate and what is the mother of all celebration? The day I was born!

One of my favorite things to do for friends and family is to make them feel special. I love celebrating engagements, showers, and birthdays. The planning and creativity it takes to put on a good celebrations is a natural high for this type A gal. My birthday is just an excuse to shop, eat, and gather my favorite people around me. 

Starting off the celebration if you follow me on instagram, twitter, or Facebook you might have noticed my new profile photo. This year's birthday is a milestone for me and I wanted to re vamp my career image as well as capture the years I've lived with new headshots. Thanks to Maus Photography for the stunning images.

I may have started the month off with a little online shopping madness. I just couldn't help it. Keep an eye out on my youtube channel for all the details of these pretty presents I treated myself to. 

My sister and nephew are in town and we started off by having some lovely hot pot and ice-cream macarons. 

How do you like to celebrate your birthday? What activities should I do this month? 

Don't forget to subscribe to my youtube channel for all the hauls, makeup, and fashion videos coming up as well as a HUGE announcement to be made next week!!! I'm squealing with excitement. 

Follow me on instagram & twitter for up to the minute updates on my month long celebration. 

My Hoopla Adventures and Thank You!

Below is a recent newsletter I sent out to my customer list. As many of you know I am a stella dot stylist. This past week was the annual conference for all stylist and the preview for our fall collection. Reflecting on my trip, I sent out this thank you and update to all my customers and thought it was a good post to share with my readers as well :-) Just got back from this year's Hoopla at Paris Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas and wanted to share with you my trip and the exciting new fall collection.  View this email in your browser

Lessons Learned and Thank You! Doing something I'm afraid of has payoffs Many of you know me personally, some do not, but attending Hoopla goes against my personality. I usually avoid large crowds and groups, especially alone. My tendency is to shy away from motivational speakers and sales conferences. Well, for some reason or another I signed up for hoopla months ago on a whim not knowing if I would have anyone to attend with or what to expect. All I knew was I wanted to be a part of the experience. It didn't even hit me that just attending the huge annual event was such a big deal for me until my husband who drove out to meet me sat with me at lunch one day and said "I'm really proud of you for doing this. For stepping out of your box and coming here." Holding back tears, I realized just getting to that moment, just showing up was an achievement for me. I won't go into too much details about all the great lessons I learned, mostly that I can do anything I set my mind to, a reminder that I desperately needed and forgotten as I've grown up. I want to thank you to all my customers, mostly my friends or friends of friends for supporting my dreams and helping me build my own business. To you this maybe just a great tote, bracelet, earrings, or necklace, to me it's so much more. It's independence, freedom, growth, and most importantly meeting and learning from each of you. Thank you for your support these last 9 months and thank you for your business, because it is so much more than jewelry for me. Love- Serein P.S. Below are photos from my trip and glances of the new fall line :-) http://www.stelladot.com/sledford

First official day of Hoopla when I've picked up my badge and swag bag! How cute is the new metalic "how does she do it" tote?! Doubles as an adorable diaper bag or mommy bag.  These 2 amazing ladies adopted me and took me under their wings. Here we are enjoying some cocktails from the lounge. Tonya earned the amazing Red Tec Tote that she worked so hard for, which makes the bag even more precious. Can't wait to get the black version for myself :-) Here I was all on my own checking out the fall collection! I took these shots of some of the beautiful statement pieces coming out.  I'll be getting all my fall samples and look books this week, Let me know if you'd like me to send a look book or if you have any questions!

Another Birthday Come and Gone

So as I reach another birthday I reflect on the last year of my life. It's been a little less than a month since my personal holiday.

Sometimes as excited as I get about celebrating my day, there's a deep rooted sadness that I feel around the 19th of April as well. As I get older each year the sadness becomes more prominent. This could be the fact that as a child you never imagine yourself past 20.

This year was the marking of truly feeling like an adult, yet still not quite. Do we ever feel our age? I seem to have age identity crisis a lot.

This I've done this year:

I planned a wedding and got married!
As much as I love being married and I adore my husband, who makes me the happiest woman on Earth, I never actually imagined being married before meeting him.

So as I look back at 2012, getting married was a huge milestone in my life and it happened last year! Just sitting back and reflecting on the whole process of being engaged. Planning the wedding. Getting married. It's all very overwhelming. No matter how much I knew my husband or how much I loved him before the wedding, something happens when the vows are said, the ceremony is over and that little wedding band is on both of our fingers. I can't explain it, but a shift happens. Expectations change, not bad, not good, things just change. It's you and him forever now. You have a partner for life. You are responsible for another's well being and hapienss. It's a huge adjustment mentally.

Youtube Beauty Guru
I've also become an active youtuber posting multiple videos a week on beauty, product reviews, makeup tutorials, and shopping hauls. I never would have thought of myself as a youtuber. If you asked me a few months ago even, I would laugh and be embarrassed of my endeavor to advise through youtube. Making videos has become an outlet for me. Videos fill my creative needs and also makes me feel productive and helpful to others. It's become my main source of daily expression and creativity. I get complete creative control talking about things I'm passionate about.

Yoga?
I became a Yogi in the last year as well. In college I hated yoga, I didn't see the point, now I need it. The breathing, the stretching, the community, it all calms me and centers my mind. The physical benefits are great too!

Independence
I've learned to be alone. Being alone use to lead to depression and feeling like a looser for me. Now I cherish the moments of solitude. To do my own thing and not be disrupted or worried about someone else. While I love my friends and always need them in my life, I have learned that as we age and grow up and build our own families, the time we do get to spend together is precious and rare. Just because I don't hear from them every day doesn't mean that they would be there for me if I needed them. This goes for them too. I don't feel the need to have to call them everyday, we are all busy and trying to live life. In fact my best friends are the ones I see the least.

Move On
This is something I'll always struggle with, but looking back at the last year, I've really improved this trait. It use to take me years to move on from the smallest slights or fights. Now mostly I figure it's not personal, but something the other person is going through. How often do I start a fight or get upset at someone because of my own insecurities or issues? Almost always. So 90% of the time if someone has beef with you, it's really not personal.

Growing up has made me a better partner and friend to those in my life. Do I still get a little sad around my birthday? Yes. I think it's the panic that I haven't done enough with my life or that I am not where I thought I would be, but honestly? Who is exactly where they thought they would be? Life is unexpected and beautiful. The control freak side of me needs to just shut up and enjoy the ride because looking back at the last year, It's been a pretty great one :-)

How To Extend the Life of False Eyelashes!

How To Extend the Life of False Eyelashes!

My friend Sarah recently told me her little trick for making her false eyelashes last for 3 to 4 uses. She is an amazing singer and actress and works as an equity performer, so she wears her eyelashes up to 8 times a week with an allowance of one new set a week. 

While most of her co-stars end up having to buy more, hers just keep on going! This is how she does it:

First she cuts her full set in half and creates 2 sets (you can skip this if you prefer full lashes, but I find that I prefer half lashes anyways since they feel and look better)

After each use she soaks them in equal parts water and rubbing alcohol, about 1 tbs. each.

Soak over night.

In the AM gently pull the glue (now soft) off.

Pat lashes dry

Separate and brush the lashes with an eyebrow brush. 

Form back into the plastic packaging to dry. 

So easy! 

Check out Sarah’s website 

Her youtube channel

Orange Ambition

ORANGE AMBITION

Now if you told me last month that I’d be obsessed with all things orange, I would have thought you were crazy.

Well folks, It’s official I’m obsessed with orange or a nicer name for it coral. I never would have thought orange blush would work on my yellow toned skin. Who would have thought that my new favorite lip product would be Revlon’s Just Bitten Kissable Balm Stain in Rendezvous (orange)? Or how about my favorite candle Market Peach from Bath and Body Works, again orange.


I would have to say my love for orange started with buying my first slightly orange beauty product at the suggestion of Tanya Burr. In her Monthly Favorites video  she mentioned Clinque Chubby Stick in Hibiscus. I had to have it and when I ran to the department store to get my own, I was scared when I saw it in person and realized it was an orange based red and more orange than red. Then I tried it. At first I was hesitant, so bold of a color, so not use to it, then I notices how great the slightly orange toned red looked agains my skin and with no other make up on at all it really brightened my whole face. 
Then I started to be drawn towards the beautiful coral nail polishes from L’oreal and Butter London. After watching Essie Button’s latest favorites video where she mentions Stilla’s convertible color in gladiola, I thought well I need to try that. Even when I swatch it at the store I was hesitant, I mean it is VERY orange.

Today was a almost no make up day and I decided to pat a bit of the scary cream gladiola on my cheeks. I was surprised by the blend-ability of the color and how it really brightened up my face. It didn’t even seem orange, more of a natural peachy glow from within.

Who knows what I”ll broaden my pallet to next. It really is like a kid and her brussels sprouts, just because as a kid you hated it, doesn’t mean your adult pallet won’t like it. I think orange is my brussels sprout in beauty. That is also why I love makeup so much! You can explore, create, express, and just feel good from a new lipstick or blush or in my case a chubby stick and cream color.

What colors do you avoid? What have you been hesitant to try? I dare you to go try it this month, it’s just makeup, you can always wash it off. Go and have some fun, be bold, be daring, be happy!

Sometimes Your Just Surrounded by Assholes

There’s only 41 days left before I am a Mrs. I am checking things off my list of things to do and trying to stay focused on living a healthy, full, and productive life. Sometimes when I stop and look around I get a little panicky. I try not to have too much free time these days because it can cause anxiety and some depression on my part. Then last night, during my yoga class my teacher said, “Before we self diagnose that we are depressed or insecure, look around, maybe you’re just surrounded by assholes.”

Now I don’t think you should blame your problems on others or not take responsibility for your actions, but there’s truth to her statement. Sometimes no matter how hard I work and what I do, I feel yucky at the end of the day or something just makes me feel bad. I try to stay positive and I try to fix the situation instead of dwelling on it. But today, for example, when I was leaving the bank, I put my car in reverse and started to back up when this woman pulled up behind me. I stopped, but she proceeded to honk at me, not just one honk, multiple honks. I got really angry. I actually almost did an inappropriate hand gesture. I was already backing up and she was the one speeding behind me, wanting the spot next to me.

I started to feel guilty because I really shouldn’t be that upset, but I think this is a case where I was surrounded by an asshole.

What really frustrates me is when people don’t take responsibility for their actions. Now if I had kept backing up and had not made eye contact with the woman or didn’t see her, which I admit has happened in the past, then I take responsibility, please do honk at me to prevent an accident.

It’s the same thing when I’m at a light trying to make a right turn and the car behind me honks. Really?! Usually if I’m not going it’s because there is a pedestrian crossing the street. The car behind me can’t see, but they are so impatient that they have to rudely honk.  Some times, I get spiteful and will wait even longer just to irritate the guy behind me, but then that makes me the asshole.

Be responsible for your actions. Do everything you can to live a good, healthy, and productive life. Everything is going well in my life. I’m happier then I’ve been in years, I feel like I have a purpose, though at times I’m stressed out of my mind. Everything I can control is under control, but I still occasionally get that icky feeling. I’m just now realizing that that icky feeling isn’t always something I did or didn’t do, it’s from the assholes around me.

I Think My Esthetician Hates Me.

I think my esthetician hates me. 

I’ve been getting monthly facials in preparation for my upcoming wedding. I bought a 6-month package and I’ve gone in 4 times now. I swear my esthetician doesn’t like me. While she always has some warm chatter, she seems a little cold and I can’t help, but feel that she is judging me.

Perhaps it’s the fact that I’m at a med spa that serves the rich and famous in the trendy part of Hollywood, I just feel slightly unwelcomed. Maybe it’s just my own insecurities…actually it probably is.

Have you ever felt this way? Where you’re a little out of place and instead of recognizing it’s you, you end up blaming others for how you feel? What is that quote? “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” -Eleanor Roosevelt.

Who cares if my esthetician doesn’t like me? She is always on time with my appointments and does a great job, a job that I pay her for. We don’t have to be best friends, in fact we don’t even have to speak to each other, I’m there to get my skin scrubbed and polished and that’s exactly what she does for me and does it damn well.

Somehow I feel a little intimidated walking into the place. Maybe it’s all the ladies who lunch on Botox injections instead of wedge salads. Maybe it’s the long list of skin care options that they offer and I have no idea what they are, the crisp white couches, or maybe it’s just a part of town that I’m not familiar with. Either way, no one has been out right rude or mean to me.  They usually just offer me cucumber water or Perrier.

I can’t help feeling that my insecurities also come from the fact that I’m usually in my comfy, not so stylish clothes, and no make up. So when I preach about always looking your best to feel your best, why am I not following my own advice in this situation? It’s like I’m setting myself up for failure right?

I complain that everyone at the spa seems so glamorous and well groomed and styled; well they choose to put effort in their appearance. They care. They understand that it’s important to look their best; I mean, they are at a spa. So why do I give myself the excuse to dress down? I don’t dress down for yoga or the gym. In fact, my gym clothes are things I would be proud to be seen in.

Dressing for the occasion matters, but you should never dress down.

Next month I am going to follow my own advice for my facial and see if the same insecurities show up. 

Advice From a Stranger

Recently I was given a piece of wisdom; “never take advice from someone you wouldn’t want to switch places with.” It was like the universe heard all my fears and frustrations and gifted me with these words at a soon-to-be dark hour.

I was feeling a bit sad and doubting some of my decisions that I had made, even though I feel the happiest I’ve been in years. You know how sometimes, when everything is going well, great things are happening, and you’re busier than ever (but in a good way), somehow doubt manages to sneak up from no where? Well that was happening. Some people in my life, while I’m sure meant well, were making me doubt my actions.

It’s funny how when you’re happiest and passionate about something, people who are not as happy or are insecure, start to put their doubts and fears onto you. Normally I’d put on the old sweats, grab a bag of Ruffles Sour Cream and Cheddar, a coke, and plop down on the couch in front of the T.V., claiming that I was re-evaluating my path. Instead, I walked into a meeting for the first time where I didn’t know anyone and the woman leading the orientation gave me the words of wisdom, “never take advice from someone you wouldn’t want to switch places with.” This is so simple and phrased so beautifully. While I had grasped the concept, it was much clearer hearing these words from a complete stranger.

I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I’m marring the man I love in 2 months, I feel proactive and in control of my destiny. There are so many great things happening in my life. So while I may have occasional problems and hiccups, I wouldn’t want to trade my life for anyone else’s right now.  Things are good.

Things are good
At my bridal shower

The wonderful woman that gave me the piece of advice that I keep reminding myself with for the last few weeks is Menena Givens. She is my adopted sales director for Mary Kay. Now I know there can be a lot of stigma that goes along with Mary Kay, but I also have met a lot of women in the past 3 weeks who have used the products for years and love it. I had looked into selling Mary Kay back in college, but found it too confusing. However, when I was really stressed last month about my upcoming wedding and worried about my new business venture, I was given a free facial with a bridesmaid by a Mary Kay Independent Sales Consultant.

My fist skincare party

She didn’t sell me or try to recruit me. She just gave my friend and I a wonderful experience. I was shocked at how much better my skin looked and what high quality products they offered, then my friend said, “you would be really good at this.” I laughed it off. But the idea kept popping into my head for a week.  I thought about how much fun it would be to give other women the same wonderful experience I had and help them feel beautiful on a different level. So I e-mailed Vicki, my Mary Kay Independent Sales Consultant…now recruiter and have met some amazing women in the last 3 weeks.  I figured worse case I’d just pay the $100 for my starter kit and play with the products and use the discount for myself, but the more I read about Mary Kay the more I wanted to share it’s legacy with others. I was inspired and felt passionate and full of possibilities.

I started to actually wear make-up, just because I could.  I felt prettier and better about myself.  My skin has never looked better either! My sales director encouraged me to attend the weekly meetings, so I did, feeling insecure and scared. What I found at the meetings were a bunch of inspiring, passionate, and motivated individuals. I’ve never encountered so many positive attitudes. Everyone was so welcoming and helpful. The problem was, not everyone in my life was super supportive about MK. Some questioned why I would do this? Don’t I have enough going on? MK?! Really?! So I walked into my first meeting already starting to doubt myself, but then I heard a few of the women’s stories and became inspired again. MK isn’t just about cosmetics and sales. MK is about women empowering women. Taking control of your life and goal setting. Mary Kay is helping me to see the positive side of things, plus it’s really fun and It’s helped me catch up with friends I haven’t seen in awhile.

So next time someone starts to make you feel doubtful about your life and your choices, think about it, would you want to switch places with them? Odds are…probably not. 

Happiness is a Bow and a Bone

I’ve been pretty busy lately, so busy that I haven’t even taken my dog to the groomers. Her hair had gotten a little crazy. She started to look like a little 4 lb lion.  This week I made an appointment to take Dolly to the groomers. While she was there, I’d take a yoga class and breath.

Before groomers

When I got her back they had put these cutes bows in her hair. This was a first, normally they just tie an adorable handkerchief around her neck that gets torn off the second she gets home and plays with her brother.

The grooming and the bows made Dolly look like a doll. She was adorable. She seemed to even know that she was more adorable then normal. She ran around the house all happy and wagging her little butt. It must feel good to be able to see and not have all that hair in her way, plus it’s been really hot lately in the valley, so I’m sure the shorter hair was appreciated.

After Groomers

This got me thinking about if animals really do know how cute they are? Of course not, but I bet they feel good after a much needed bath and good brushing. I bet that they sense how cute they are by how humans react to them. I know that when I get a haircut I feel better. For one thing I can see again because my bangs get trimmed out of my eyes. Having someone massage your head as they wash your hair is fantastic too and of course it’s always great to hear the complements of your new do.

Check out my cool bows

While animals don’t know how cute they are, they feel good by all the complements and attention they get from us. It’s amazing to watch my dogs soak up the attention from me, my fiancé, or even a complete stranger. Why don’t we allow ourselves to truly enjoy the attentions given sometimes? I think it’s a fear of accepting a complement because it might be true or maybe we don’t want to seem conceded or vain. What’s wrong with taking care of yourself to feel good and accepting the compliments? We groom ourselves to feel good, so soak it up.

Dry Bars have been popping up all over lately, which is a great idea. If you don’t have time for a cut or can’t afford a trim every 4 weeks, why not treat yourself to a blow out? They offer wine and a great head massage as your shampooed and your hair looks great for a few days if you can manage to not wash it.

My dogs are some of the happiest creatures and I really think it’s because they can take a complement and soak up the admiration. Nothing makes Dolly happier than a bone and a bow, the bone for her personal pleasure, the bow because of the attention it brings. 

How Vera Wang Taught Me To Savor The Moment

Live in the moment and the pleasure of things before it’s gone. This past weekend I had the pleasure of helping a good friend shop for her wedding dress. A part of me was a little worried that I wouldn’t have fun because my dress experience was so stressful. I knew what my friend wanted and what she liked and what was her, so I started by making a few appointments. Unfortunately making dress appointments the week of is a little challenging. After making the appointments I called my sister to confirm with her that these places were going to give my friend the treatment she deserved. My sister had been to every dress place in Southern California at this point and said they would be good.

I got up early for a Saturday and headed to Costa Mesa to meet my friend. The whole way I was nervous, what if she hated this place, what if the experience won’t be fun, what if we can’t find anything? What if?! Then she called, she was already there, but I couldn’t find the place and it was already 10am!  How is it that I always get lost? She, the bride talked me to the correct shopping center and I relaxed. Seeing her happy face, I took a breath; she is excited and always positive, so why shouldn’t I be. She’s not going to blame me if she doesn’t have a good time, I hope.

We enter the fancy bridal shop, with beautiful chandeliers and a calm aura. The wonderful personal shopper was kind, attentive, asked all the right questions, and was super sweet to my friend. I relaxed. She was whisked away into a room full of Vera and Monique. I knew she would be happy with her friends.

I however was left with a few Newport Beach housewives, who could have used a little less Botox and filler and a little more humanity and class. I always forget how money can’t buy style or class; instead they had plenty of snobbery and pseudo wealth.

Then my friend came out in her first dress. She was stunning and beautiful. She looked romantic and very ballerina like, just like she envisioned. Words can’t do her image justice. The whole day was fun from there on out. We spent 2 hours trying on dresses, and then went to have lunch and purchase shoes for my wedding. We ended the day with another bridal shop that was just as accommodating and spent another 2 hours playing dress up.

The whole day made me realize you only get one of these days. You only get to be a bride once (at least for the first time). This experience can only happen once. So why not savor every moment good or bad, enjoy the pleasures that the experience has to offer because it will never happen again. Even if my friend tries on the dress again at another store, that first dress she ever put on at the first store is the first wedding dress she has ever seen herself in.

Lately I’ve been overwhelmed with starting my own business, planning my wedding, and a baby shower, that I’m not enjoying the process anymore. There has been more stress and frustration with everything then pleasure. So I’m going to remember the day I saw my friend in a Vera Wang wedding dress and savor the moment. Because once a moment has passed, it’ll never happen again.  Time is so precious and I spend so much of it in a cloud of anxiety. 

Another Birthday, Thank You!

As another birthday quickly approaches, I suddenly started thinking a lot about where I’ve been and where I’m going to go. When I originally started this blog at the tail end of 2011, I had just started to put my life back in order. While many people in my life still don’t know this, I was incredibly unhappy and depressed. I didn’t like who I was. Nothing was working, I was completely loss. In the beginning I blamed everyone else and the universe. Then after reading a blog post that originally I subscribed, to support a friend, I started thinking about how to get better and make things better. Her blogs were always so positive and interesting, but this one post really made me want to change things. It made me think I wasn’t alone in feeling this way.

Now I haven’t even seen this girl in years, but her voice spoke to me. I can never be thankful enough to her. With the combination of her blogs and some professional help, I started to take small steps to change things. For a while I completely disconnected from everyone. I had to be alone to figure things out. Only recently have I started to slowly reach out to past relationships to find new ways to build them back up with the new me. I realize that I may have lost some because I wasn’t able to be open to them while I was figuring out how to heal and that hurts, but it’s something that I have to deal with and figure out how to prevent in the future. I have changed and many won’t like the new me. I have to except this. A part of me feels a betrayal by people who didn’t notice how unhappy and depressed I was, while they continued to live these happy fulfilling lives. Now I know this is all perception and how could they even know what was going on with me when I started to pull away? I’m not saying this is logical, but it’s how I felt and sometimes still feel. So as I start to navigate my new and old relationships, I’m a little more cautious and awkward (if that can be possible).

A few key things that I learned for myself is that this will always be an ongoing process, to find happiness and keep it. It helps that I’m learning to cherish the little things and celebrate achievements that may seem small to others, but are big for me.  For example this past Sunday I ran 6mi at 1hour and 8 minutes. This is really big for me. I’m not a runner. I hate running. I want to usually give up before I even hit the .5-mile marker, but I’m training for a 10K in support of PCRF, so I need to run, for the kids who can’t. I may not be the fastest runner, but I can do this.

Stay busy. Now I’m not saying to be so busy that I don’t have time to think or process what’s been going on in my life, but to do something. I became complacent and lethargic. I was wasting time in front of the TV. While I love my shows, I wasn’t even watching TV, just sitting in front of it and sleeping A LOT. My sweats were my best friends. Now, I plan my days including meals, and workouts, which I have learned I have to have to stay mentally healthy. I try to keep a normal sleep schedule by getting up before 8am and going to bed no later than midnight. Sleep is important and having a regular schedule is even more important for me.

Feeling a sense of achievement too is important, that is why I started the blog originally, to have a place to express myself in a positive manner, to have something to do at least once a week. So I want to thank everyone that is reading this right now. You have helped me heal. You have kept me positive. You are doing more than you think, just by opening a link or e-mail.

Being honest with myself. This one is hard because it can be hard to look in the mirror. I promised this year that I wouldn’t compromise myself for anyone or anything. I won’t do things because I feel obligated and guilty for not wanting to participate. This one is VERY hard for me, but oh so important. I have always done things to make others happy, to make others comfortable, and to make sure everyone gets what they want. This is very dangerous because I start to compromise my wants and needs for others and my life becomes about pleasing everyone around me and making sure they get what they want. It’s time for me to learn to say no, when I am overwhelmed or simply because I don’t want to.

My best friend reminded me today that I don’t owe anyone any explanations. Somehow I always feel like I have to sugar coat things, which end up confusing people. It is my right to say no and that’s it. I can’t control how people feel, so all I can do is be honest and leave it at that. Everyone is better off.

I still have my moments where I feel like I’m slipping back into my old self, but I’m starting to see the signs, one being my choice in wardrobe. How I feel is usually how I dress. So while I may not notice my mood or understand my feelings right away, I can see it in my choice of clothing. Noticing the signs are important for me. It helps me to take action before a bad day turns into a bad week or even months.

Now I have so many things to be grateful for and am so excited for the possibilities and where I’m going. I’m getting married this year to a wonderful man who has always believed in me even when I stopped. I am starting my own business, so that I can work for myself doing something that I believe in and feel good about on my schedule. So as my birthday quickly approaches and I spend it quietly with my fiancé, I am incredibly grateful and happy for everything I've learned and gone through. I do believe everything happens for a reason and that there are lessons to be learned. Though all this I rediscovered my passion for fashion and decided to take control of my work situation by working for myself. None of the good would have happened without the bad.